A Nightmare of My Making
by LeeDaMan
Summary: Vexx fanfic. The aftermath of Vexx's battle with Dark Yabu: Vexx reflects if he truly made the right choice. Vexx's POV.


Finally - a chance to give to FanFiction something that there is very little of - Vexx fanfiction. There are a few Vexx fans on the site, so I thought I would contribute to the meagre source of Vexx fanfics that lay in a distant corner of the site. Enjoy, Vexx fans.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Vexx (dangnammit). He and the game is teh creation of Accliam entertaqinment, now owned by throwback Studios. Rumours are for a sequel made by throwback, but hopes aren't high. Oh well - on with the show.

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_The void was silent. There was no sound. There was no wind. There was merely the scattered remains of a battlefield, used and discarded like a rag doll. Fragments floated in the gravity defiant abyss. Nightmarish creatures clung to the chunks of rock as they floated in an eternity of darkness._

_The destructive sound of metal on rock cleaved through the silence, causing the creatures to turn to the unwanted sound. The screeching cacophony seemed to reverberate, even in the nothingness of the Shadowrealm. The dark creatures leapt into space, gliding to the source of the noise._

I clambered up onto the fragment of the bridge that had collapsed beneath me, seemingly only moments before. I had defeated Dark Yabu. His reign was finally over. Then why, I thought as I looked around myself in despair, why did this mean nothing to me? The silence frightened me – I had known silence after I first found the War Talons, but nothing like this – complete and eternal.

_The shadowraiths knew an enemy when they saw one. This was the boy who destroyed their creator, their leader, their father...they leapt upon the crag of rock, desperate to get their hands on him. They surrounded the young boy, bearing vicious teeth and gnawing __them__ together, their bodies dragging behind them like wisps of vile smoke, the spawn of evil itself threatening to close its jaws upon his flesh._

Anger tore at the despair that surged through him. It wasn't fair – I was always the one to give, always the one to lose…for the greater good.

Why do I have to lose so much? Why is it no matter what I do, how hard I try, I'm the one that loses it all…just for the happiness of everyone else? Did I piss off some higher power? If there even is a higher power! Where the fuck is he now?

Why do I always lose everything?

Why, damn it…?

WHY?!?!?!

_An orb-shaped explosion of crackling blue energy shredded through the void, illuminating the darkness and blasting the wraiths into oblivion. Tortured screams scoured the silence like a bolt of lightning. The light faded, and a young boy was standing in the middle of the blast, his eyes glowing with unmatched fury, __his face distorted to a mask of anguish, contradictory to his eyes. The fury. The anguish. The hatred…_

Then there was nothing. I had come for vengeance – Dark Yabu killed my grandfather: Vargas. I killed him in his name…returning the favour, spawn…Reia called upon me to save Astara from the threat of the Shadowrealm and I succeeded. But in return, I had lost all meaning to myself. I had nothing left to gain.

I had nothing but anger. I'd had enough of it all. Reia force fed me all this "for the greater good" bullshit ever since the day Dark Yabu turned up at the Rift Station. I can never forget the conversation after that…I look back on it now, and wonder if she actually meant what she said.

"_Yabu deceived you from the beginning…used you to power the rift." She had explained, __while she was__ on her knees in despair. "He made you think I was your enemy__…__I failed…without the keystaff we can't close the rift."_

_I punched the wall in anger __leaving a dent the size of a man's head__. Dark Yabu had disappered into the Shadowrealm. Nothing could stop him now. Tears of pain__ ran__ down my face, finally succumbing to my inner demons._

"_But all hope is not lost. You can get it back." __she said, rising to her feet__, determination chiselled in her face._

_I looked at her in hope, my face contorting in savage fury. "How?" I asked immediately. _

"_Follow Yabu into the Shadowrealm," Reia proposed, walking towards me. "Your war talons will protect you. But first, you'll need to activate the structures that lie in the three outer worlds. Return here if you succeed."_

_I paused, pondering the decision. But there was no choice. I had begun this path when the talons had chosen me. There was no turning back. I walked towards an open rift portal, about to place a hand on the stone insignia that held it together._

"_Wait," Reia said suddenly, forcing me to pause. I turned to her, and she walked towards me and placed a hand on my shoulder._

_  
"This burden was never meant for you." She sighed with an age that surpassed her beauty. "The talons chose you because they recognized the nature within you, however much anger you cover it up with. Yabu killed your grandfather, and I am sorry. I hope that you gain your vengeance._

"_But there is another reason you are here now. The talons are meant for those who are ready. You are merely a child, despite what the talons have made you. The talons hold within them a light that can never be broken, even in times of utter darkness. This is what drives you, along with your hatred for Yabu's kind."_

"_What do you expect of me?" I said, looking at the floor, becoming the child I once was for a moment. "I've lost so much. Even if I destroy Yabu, what more do I have to live for? What do you expect of me?" I shouted those final words at her, knocking her hand off my shoulder as I spun to face her._

_Reia looked shocked at my transformation. "Carry on for the lives that you intend to save," she replied, looking away from me. "Regardless of your fate, yours is intertwined with Astara. While this world lives, you cannot die, for you still have a job to do. Astara needs a protector, Vexx. A hero. This is what you have become…what the talons have made you."_

_Reia looked at me again, a single tear running down her face. "All hope lies with you now. Good luck…"_

_And she was gone._

If my fate was so intertwined with Astara…why was I not saved when I saved them? What kind of gratitude is this – forsaking their _valiant_ hero for their own selfish gain? It was madness – a madness I had saved.

I fell to my knees, weeping in the silence of the void at the stupid irony of it all. The dying screams of forsaken broke the silence… and tore through my soul. Tortured cries of the doomed fused with the melody of my own tears as they crashed to the surface of my lonely island. For moments, hours, days…I still don't know. I wept alone.

Finally, after an infinite amount of tears shed, I stood. There was nothing more. Astara was a world away…I had gained my vengeance…It was my choice, then and now, to act as I would have acted if I had not defeated Yabu.

If I were dead. No…I am dead.

This place is the closest anyone could possibly get to hell. It is hell.

I walked to the tip of the dead rock, my footsteps echoing in space and time. I closed my eyes, defying the blinding light the talons gave, and stepped into the darkness, floating into nothingness as I finally gave in.

I sometimes consider my fate if I had bent to Yabu's will…what would have happened if I hadn't rebelled. Life would have gone on, and we would still be together. Enslaved, but together nonetheless. It at least would have been bearable.

Now we are both gone, doomed to wander alone in the darkness with no salvation.

Will I find my grandfather again? I cannot say. Nor do I care. I care not for the worries of a world I once knew. I no longer show concern for the fates of those past…and I do not care what happens to me, nor to my grandfather.

Now I sleep. Sleeping, dreaming, existing…in a nightmare of my own making.

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Viola. It is done. This could well be a prequel to an upcoming fic...stay tuned. For now, read and review, plzthnxbye.


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